A true test...

As I sit here and reflect on this weekend I can't even begin to put it all into words and get my thoughts together. What an INCREDIBLE weekend it was. I was surrounded by good friends, good food, pretty good weather and everything was just fantastic!

My weekend started on Friday. I am super blessed to have an incredible aunt who is a VERY gifted yoga instructor. I went to her class on Friday morning and it was fantastic. It was an awesome workout and it really helped me clear my head from the past week and get zoned in for the weekend. I then jumped in the pool and knocked out some yards for my race before I had to go to work for a few hours. I went to work and had a blast with my students, they were extremely well behaved and it was so much fun. I always enjoy going to work but when my students are well behaved and I can really have some fun with them and loosen up a bit it's a blast!  I then came home and knocked out some dinner. I made chicken burgers using a sweet potato as the roll with a little squirt of BBQ sauce. Quite delicious if I do say so myself! 

Not too much going on for Friday after that. Saturday I woke up and I was just off. I could feel it but I didn't know why and it was annoying me. I packed my bag and headed for the gym to do a brick workout. The entire way there I just didn't want to go SO BAD, but I forced myself to get there. Even when I started my bike I kept saying man I don't want to do this today!  I got through my hour long bike ride(longest I've done to date) and jumped straight on the treadmill. It ended up being a great workout and I was so happy I went. Then the TRUE TEST came. We were supposed to go out to the bar for a friends birthday. I decided I could continually run away from the bar or just accept it and go. So I went and just like my gym trip I was so glad I did! I had this image in my head of me going off the deep end and ending up getting arrested and all kinda of craziness. None of which happened. I went out with friends and had a good time just like I used to and it was PHENOMENAL. I am so happy that I went with them I can't even describe it to y'all. 

I woke up Sunday and decided to take the day off. I went to church in the morning with my brother and sister and then decided instead of working out I was going to head down to the boat to see some more friends. I got down there with my cooler full of food and we took a little ride to a beach. We hung there for awhile and played some beach games and just enjoyed the weather. When we got back to the dock my friends mom was there and I have not seen her since last summer. She about lost her marbles when she say me for the first time. She even went as far to say that I looked SPECTACULAR! Boy was that a great feeling, but it didn't stop there! There were more people who I haven't seen since last summer and they all gave me wonderful compliments. One guy in particular, Brian, who I have only met a few times came up to me before he left and said "hey man, you're doing a great job, keep it up!" It felt awesome.  I have only met this guy a handful of times but I felt like this was a true and Sincere comment and it made me feel awesome!

This is a shot I took playing one of my favorite games, Polish!

It did not even stop there though! It just kept getting better and better.  I left the boat that night because my family was having friends over who I have not seen in a long time so I really wanted to make it a point to come home.  I came back and enjoyed and awesome dinner and some great conversation with this family.  I have know them ever since I was a kind and what truly great people they are.  Paul had wrapped his arm around me multiple times and told me how great I looked.  Just before they were leaving his wife shared something with me that was very powerful and she probably didn't even realize it.  She said "I found your facebook and I was going through your pictures.  I saw your picture from the Broad Street Run and I was just in awe.  I just started working out not to long ago and I have since lost 20lbs.  I ran for 8 minutes straight for the first time not to long ago and when I saw that picture I though, if Ian can do this so can I."  What an inspiration that was.  Just knowing that I had an impact on someone helps me keep going and doing what I am doing. 

I went to sleep feeling great and woke up this morning with the intention to do a fasted cardio workout.  I have been reading up on it and figured I would give it a shot.  I laced up my kicks and went for a jog with absolutely no food or anything in my system, hence the name, fasted cardio.  It was very different.  I felt super slow although I had a beautiful run through this trail in the park around the corner from my house.  I came home and showered to head back down to the boat.  Today was supposed to be the best day of the weekend so I figured why not enjoy it down at the boat again!  I got down there and we were just hanging around the boat.  A few of my friends were fishing off the dock and I had my swim gear in the car.  After talking with my buddy he said I would be good to jump off the dock and go for a swim.  I figured this would be a great chance to get some experience in open water.  For those of you who have never swam in open water let me just say WOW!! You can jump in the pool and swim two miles with easy but getting into rough open water where you can't see your hands is a completely different ball game.  There were MULTIPLE times where I freaked out and wanted to quit.  I felt like I was learning how to swim all over again.  I finished my swim though and climbed back on to the dock.  We hung around for a few more hours and just shot the breeze.  There is a bar down the river so we motored down and grabbed a beer.  We actually towed someone down the river because their boat broke down so that was some good karma points for us.  We then threw the lines back in and had a little gentleman's bet on the fish.  My friends were laughing at me because I am not the outdoorsy type.  They told me I would never win....Man was THAT a mistake. I may not be a fisherman but god am I competetive.  I ended up winning the race to catch five fish and I caught the biggest one!

Here's a snap shot on the monster I reeled in.

  All in all I had an incredible weekend and I wouldn't trade it for the world.  I spent time with amazing friends and I couldn't have asked for more.  It was exactly what the doctor ordered as they say.  I hope all of you got out there to enjoy your weekend and remember what it is all about!  Thanks for reading and thanks for the incredible inspiration.  Keep doing what you are doing!


All for now
Keep FSU and Do It For Yourself.

And so it begins...

Where to start where to start? The million dollar shot so to speak for all of my posts. So much to say and yet no idea how to put it all on paper, or computer screen I guess is what this is. I am sitting in my house with no power due to this wonderful storm ripping through Chester county PA. This is the storm I was waiting for all day sitting at work, but it never came. Go figure it arrives now when I would like to head to sleep but I can't being as I am like the princess and the pea when it comes to sleeping arrangements. I need a tv on, something sports related preferably, fan blasting right on my face, iPhone sleep app which plays songs and a few other planets to be aligned to have a good nights sleep. All which require a power source... Being as I can't have the previously mentioned I decided to take to the Internet to reflect on the days events. It was a fairly mundane Thursday for me. I went to work at 9am sharp and was there until somewhere around 8pm. Yes there was a lot of coffee involved to get me through this shift. 

This is our last week of group swim lessons before we get things kicked off for the summer and it has been a bittersweet week for me. If you go back through the archives of the blog you'll learn about my terrific day mid week and about how I lost my uncle. That hasn't helped but it also hasn't truly sunk in yet. Along with that it is the closure to my first year of school long lessons at my current club. This was something I needed to get used to. At previous clubs I worked on sessions that only lasted somewhere around 8 weeks. After that 8 weeks was over, I wrote report cards and said my goodbyes to some students. Most would return and others would not. At this club however I have had the same students since the fall when school started. This has been a great opportunity for me on many levels. It gave me a taste of what it will be like when I am teaching physical education in a school setting. I will have the same students for the length of the school year. So I had a great chance to build some relationships with students and parents. On the other hand there are always students you have difficulty reaching. I am sure any teacher will agree with this statement. You have students that it seems no matter how hard you try, they just don't want to be there. This can be challenging especially when it comes to teaching a life saving skill such as swimming. It was a great opportunity for me though and I am happy that I had this experience even with some of the challenges it brought forth in the day to day teaching. 

As I sit here with no power I find myself reflecting yet again. A lot of my friends are in town and they decided they wanted to, well you guessed it, go to the bar. I suggested a little joint that only charges $3 for whatever drink your order and has free shuffle board. Shuffle board brings back some great childhood memories for me and I'm not one for a huge bar scene anymore. They decided to go for a more college feel and so I declined to go. It's not my thing anymore for multiple reasons as outlined in previous posts and I am ok with that. I just surely wish there were other activities that were an option to see old friends that weren't centered around drinking. While I was away last weekend someone had brought up going out and my buddy said his "social life significantly struggled" since I had made this decision. Although he said it jokingly, part of me feels like it might have a little truth behind it. I have no interest in going to the bar and getting slammed only to wake up the next day wonder, what the heck happened last night?? However I don't want to hold people back from going out and having a good time. So I hope that is not the case by any means.  

One of my buddies walked across the street to say what's up and the conversation just felt awkward. I felt like I didn't know what to say and it seemed as though he may have felt the same way. I don't want to lose good friends because I don't have an interest in going out, but I also don't want to give up on the goals I have set for myself. I just wish there was a road in the middle that made this a little easier. 

Tomorrow I have yoga on tap in the AM probably followed up with 2,000-2,500 yds in the pool. My focus is on my race in September for right now. I have decided that I want to place in the top tier for my age group and I think it is a realistic goal for myself. (Power is back on so that's good!) It is funny because when I mentioned something about placing as a 23 year old in my race, someone responded with "they didn't care about competitive swimming as a 23 year old" which is fine but a little support would be cool. I have my goals just as anyone else and I don't think they need to be the same for anyone, actually they should be quite different from individual to individual but help a brotha out!

Memorial Day weekend is on tap and I don't have to work which is a great feeling being as I have busted my tail a bit this week. I say I am going to do yoga but I need to bite the bullet and head to the bank tomorrow as well before I have to go to work. I have decided I need to throw on my big boy pants and take out a loan for these summer courses. I don't really have any other option and I can't ask anyone else for the help. Not do I have anyone who will give me the cash I need to get these classes out of the way. 

I feel stuck in a rut here that I can't shake. I find myself thinking of the past when I need to focus on what's current and the future. It's a little more easier said than done though. Being as the power has kicked back on I am going to try to take this golden opportunity to try and get some sleep. I am going to bed with an open mind that tomorrow WILL be a better day and I will get everything figured out for this summer. Hope everyone enjoys there long holiday weekend! Thanks again for reading. 

All for now

Keep FSU and Do It For Yourself

When it rains it pours...

If you read my post from yesterday afternoon you would have thought that I was on top of the world. Well just as fast as I went up, I came back down. It's been a hell of a day that's for sure. 

It started yesterday when I got home from work. There was a bill from school, which obviously I knew was coming. I have to take two classes this summer so that I can graduate in the fall and pursue my dream of teaching physical education. However, it is going to cost money to go to school in the summer and that isn't covered by financial aid.  At this point you may be thinking, you're still young, why not ask your parents for help. You're right, I am and my family isn't wealthy by any definition of the word.  Cue more bad news... My father is out of a job right now and I don't know where I am going to get the money to get these classes out of the way. By taking class that limits my work schedule which in turn limits my income. I have no clue where I'm going to get the money to cover this and it's causing me sooooo much stress. Not to mention it's making my schedule for summer a nightmare. 

Just as you thought it ended there, it doesn't. We got a call last night that my uncle had passed away. So just pile it on. The emotion train is rolling and it ain't stopping there.  I thought that more people would be here for me during this time, but I think I have gotten a total of 2-3 texts from friends sending their condolences.  I woke up this morning, in a terrible mood and just wanted to put everything behind me and get a solid workout in. Without even thinking I grabbed a bottle and took what I thought was my morning supplements... and then I realized I just took a freaking sleeping pill instead of my supplements that I usually take. Genius right? Yeah I know...

It's just been one if those days where it feels like if there is something that could go wrong, it did. My heart was literally pounding out of my chest and I needed to get to the gym. I feel at home in the gym but I feel even more at home in the water. I just jumped in and started going. Water is amazing and it cleanses me of everything going on and it's just me and the water at that moment. It's funny how it all works. 

After my swim I was still feeling off but I had to go to work. I got there and gathered all my equipment and got my happy face on. Working with kids has taught me that you can't show them anything but happy and you have to stay on your A game. I'm not saying hide all emotions but you need to leave everything at the door. It's incredible what children can do for you. As soon as I started they completely changed my mood around. They are AMAZING and I have the best time in the world with them. One of my parents actually came up to me after his son's lesson and shook my hand. He said "thanks for everything that you've done, we really appreciate it." Talk about an amazing feeling, when you touch the life of a child, you just can't compare it to anything else. My student gave me an awesome card that he made with a picture of me on it! It was just an irreplaceable moment all around that I really needed. 

My pretty crappy day turned around slightly but I'm just trying to maintain at this point. I gotta find my spot again, that place where I can live care free for awhile.  It is my absolute DREAM to move to California.  I want to live there and teach physical education. I want to have crazy long hair and surf everyday and compete at a competitive level in triathlons. I want to teach parents and students about the importance of being physically active and healthy. I know you're reading this and I want to thank YOU for bringing this back into the forefront. I will stop at nothing until I reach this goal.  Thanks for letting me vent. Hope y'all had a better day than I did, sure wouldn't take much. Keep it up and thanks for reading. 

All for now

Keep FSU and Do It For Yourself

A little of this and a little of that

So this post will probably take me awhile but I want to make sure to get all the things out there that I have in my head. As you probably already know, there's a lot going on up there! Haha

So it's Monday May 20th. I am coming off an awesome weekend away! Had a blast with my buddy all weekend, yeah the same one who left me high and dry on the run! Haha just kidding ;) I was showered over with compliments and boy did it feel great!  I'm not someone who goes fishing for compliments or needs them just to get through the day. HOWEVER I will have you know, I do love me a good compliment now and again :). Other than that, it was a pretty standard weekend away. A hell of a lot of  NOTHING to do in Chambersburg PA that's for sure. 

Today is a pretty standard Monday for me, got up and made breakfast. Decided I should probably go green smoothly to detox some of the crap that was in my system. I only cheated twice, but my theory is if you're going to cheat, ya gotta at least make it count! So I had a big ole burger one night and some chicken wings the other. Nothing too crazy though. I have learned through this little journey that for me if I have a craving for something, I eat it. If I want a cookie I have one, or ice cream or candy, etc. If I deprive myself from things like this then all I do is think about it for the next three or four days.  Cue the downward snowball effect now and next thing you know I'm eating and entire box of cookies as opposed to just eating one when I had the craving for it. As I have said before I'm not the best out there, hell I don't even know half the things some do, but I have experienced it, I have lived it, so hey maybe I know a little something. 

Here is my delicious smoothie from this morning:

1/3 cup each of avocado, strawberries, and blueberries. 1 green apple and a little bit of water BOOM!

After I devoured this deliciousness I headed out the door to work. I jumped in the car and poked around my radio stations, then comes Teenage Dream by Katy Perry and I about lost it. It's incredible how one song can take you back to this spot in your life where you were and you feel everything you felt in that moment. I hate it and I love it all at the same time. This song was probably one of the first songs someone said they thought about me when they heard and so they would sing it to me or text me the lyrics, blah blah blah, I won't sit here and bore you with the details of it. It's just crazy how the words took me right back to that point. Now why am I telling you about this you may ask?  I am not really sure, I just need to get it off my chest to be honest and this is my outlet for one. For two its the third or fourth time in less than 24 hours something has happened and I've immediately thought of...well yeah you can guess by now. 

I guess the other reason I bring this up is because it ties in to what one of the guys said to me this weekeend in a way. If you'll remember he said "don't let anything or anyone get in your way!". When it comes to something like this, something that takes a lot of focus out of you sometimes it can be hard to not let thing get in your way. Especially when you're talking about feelings. Like I said before I'm taking everything careful but I'm certainly not brushing it under the rug, everything happens for a reason. Along with that I came to the conclusion that with this sport, it is about 10-20% training and probably 80-90% mental. It takes a huge toll on you mentally to stay on track and stay dedicated to what you want. But when you want something as bad as you need to breath you will make it happen!

This weekend was a reminder that I am doing great things and I CANNOT and WILL NOT give up!  The motivation that I got to keep going was incredible and I loved it. I needed it and it was absolutely the perfect push. This game is so mental and when someone gives you that push by showing they care, it amazing. I would love to have the effect that these people have had on me on someone else. That would make me successful. That would be just absolutely amazing. 

Well I am done work and done what I think is everything I had to say so it's time to pack it in and go hit the road for a little run!  Thanks for reading, come back again :)

All for now

Keep FSU and Do It For Yourself

Weekend Warrior

So I am sitting here in my hotel room in Chambersburg PA, ever heard of it? Yeah didn't think so....  I am here for the weekend, well was kind of, I am going home tomorrow.  I came here to see some people who I haven't seen since this time last year.  It weird to look back because a year ago at this time I was in a very different spot.  The people who I see everyday or just about everyday can see some changes and are amazed and support me fully in what I have been doing.  These people haven't seen me for an entire year and had no idea that I have embarked on this journey. 

I got here Friday and the response from most if not all of the guys was just complete amazement.  They wanted to know the who, what, when, why, where and how of everything.  Just about every hand I shook, they said that I looked great and completely amazing.  Now let me side track for a minute and reference a blog that I had posted a little while back on this comment.  I know I went off about it, but for some reason it was different this time.  It was sincere and it was a compliment and it made me feel AMAZING!  They actually seem to care about what I am doing and why and that makes me feel good.  On Friday one guy who came up to me really motivated me and gave me a nice push and he probably didn't even know it.  He made it a point to come over and say that I looked really good and he thought it was awesome what I was doing.  He was asking what I had been doing and was legitimately INTERESTED in what I had to say.  it was magnificent and I loved every second of it!

Today, Saturday May 18, I woke up and had some breakfast.  As you can guess no it was not hotel breakfast.  I brought tons of food with me for this weekend, which I of course was laughed at for, so that I did not get off track.  I cooked plenty of chicken, brought my snack mix, natural peanut butter, rice, the whole nine.  After scarfing down some breakfast I strapped up and decided to head out on the road for a nice little run around town. 

My buddy was here with me and he was in the room as I laced up my kicks.  The guys around the hotel were cracking beers and laughing at me as I walked out the door for my run.  I headed out and did this 1.5 mile loop to find a neighborhood.  Neighborhoods are definitely my friend when running in areas I do not know well.  I do not like running on the road where there is next to no shoulder.  The neighborhood has some absolutely BEAUTIFUL houses and it was a nice little loop to hit as well. 

After I put in about five miles and some changed I decided it was time to head back to my room and get cleaned up for the day.  I had to laugh a little when I got back because my buddy was taking a nap and I just finished up a five mile run!  As I walked out on to the balcony I got some looks like what is wrong with this dude?!?!  Most of the dudes had blood shot eyes and were moving a little slow to say the least.  So I stretched out and got my shower to clean up for the day.  As I stoop on the balcony I thought to myself holy cow...I never thought I would be that guy who woke up and went for a run as everyone else was still asleep nursing their hangover or up starting to drink again.  Let me tell you thought as they looked over at me with amazement, I felt just as awesome as ever because it felt like I had succeeded yet again!

The trend continued for this day, more questions and more people who were interested in what I was doing and why.  It's funny because I have learned along this journey that there are people who knew the old you(I feel like I can say I have and old me and a new me at this point) and people who see the new you.  Most people ask what you have been doing, why, how, etc.  Then there are people who ACTUALLY care about what you have been doing.  To me there is a huge difference, there are people who care about what you have done and then there are people who actually care about what you have been doing.  There are people who want details so that they can turn around and gossip about it and then there are people who actually want to know.  I am not sure if I am making the difference clear but you will see along your journey what I mean. 

It has been a VERY long year since this all started but I wouldn't change it for the world.  I have gained some new friendships and really strengthened some old ones.  For the first time I feel and can see that there are actually people out there who care, which in a way I didn't see before.  When you start making changes for yourself there are people who will laugh and talk and gossip to try and keep up.  On the flip side of the coin there are people who will care and support you in what you are doing and those people will become your ride or die crew.  The best piece of advice I can give you is one don't give up.  Someone said to me today "keep doing what you're doing and don't let anyone or anything get in your way!"  Man was that powerful!  Set a goal and don't change it! Make it a realistic and achievable goal, don't go crazy and make it something where you will ultimately fail because that will set you back so far.  However, don't short change yourself, make it something that you have to fight for.  The best things in life aren't going to come free!  Whatever you do, don't ever give up and don't stop chasing what you are after.

I am going to turn in and get some sleep, I have a long day tomorrow.  Thank you for reading and I hope that you are taking steps to get closer to whatever it may be that you are doing.  I may not be able to help you and I may not be the best but don't give up.  Take it from someone who never thought they would be that guy who would run, lift, and be obsessed about what they are eating.  Just don't ever give up!

All for now
Keep FSU and Do It For Yourself

Going Down!

So here I am hanging out on a Wednesday night.  Not much is going on today.  I ran some errands, got some new clothes and did my workout before work.  I hit vitamin shop because I needed some more BCCA's and I was a little confused.  I have been using USP Laps BCCA and I just felt like I was going through it so fast.  I did my homework when I bought it and knew it was the best bang for your buck and it had the highest ratio.  Training for my tri leads to a lot of cardio and so I do not want my body to become catabolic which is why I use a BCAA.  After talking with the employee there I stuck with the same product I have been using.

After My vitamin shop trip I ran over to Kohl's because I needed an orange shirt for this weekend.  When I grabbed my shirt I picked up a size smaller than what I usually wear which was an XL.  I grabbed a size 36 pants and went on my way to try them on.  I slipped on the new stuff and look in the mirror.  Still....TOO BIG!! It was an incredible feeling.  I went back out and still grabbed another size smaller!  At this point I was at a large shirt and size 34 shorts.  It was incredible, I can't even describe how amazing it felt.  AGAIN all that hard work paid off!! When little things like this happen it just makes you feel amazing.  It's funny how it all works but I love it to be honest and I wouldn't trade these little moments for anything!

I had an incredible workout today and I am so happy that I discovered this plan.  It kicks my butt every single day that I try it.  I thin a huge part of this is that I have the drive to go in and get every single thing I can out of my workout everyday.  It is a huge success to walk out of the gym feeling like you gave it everything you had. 

Last night I got a text regarding my bike which is a work in progress.  The guy who is putting it all back together for me rides for a local shop and I am so blessed to have his help through all of this.  His shop has donated a brand new set of tires for the bike and they are allowing him to use his team discount to order the necessary parts to get it road ready.  I CANNOT wait to get my hands on this thing and start riding.  For some reason I am just so incredibly excited to be the person I used to make fun of.  No I will not allow myself to become the guy who wears cycle shoes to spin class but I will be riding on the road so i have tried to become more understanding when I come up on a biker on the road.  I just can't describe how blessed I am to have people like this in my life and I am going to do anything I can to give back to people the way they have given to me.

I don't have much to say today, I still haven't taught myself how to jump rope, but I did but a jump rope.  That's a step right!?!?  Tomorrow I have a long day ahead of me but it is the only thing standing between me and the incredible weekend that is on tap.  I hope all my readers have an awesome weekend and I'll see you next week!

All for now

Keep FSU and Do It For Yourself

Just an Update

Good morning all, not much to say today.  There aren't really any significant updates going on today.  Just finished some breakfast which was banging and it got me to thinking.  I remember when I was incredibly uneducated when I started.  I would wake up and eat a minimal amount for breakfast.  I wanted to keep my calories low so I would have a bagel, most times white (not whole wheat or whole grain) with cream cheese and a cup of coffee.  Looking back it is almost funny how stupid and ignorant that was!

Breakfast IS in fact the most important meal of the day.  It is called breakfast because you are BREAKING a FAST.  Think about it, if you are eating small frequent meals throughout the day or even three big meals throughout the day, when is your body going more than 4-5 hours with out food at the most.  When you sleep you are not eating for an average of 8 Hours!  Your body needs that food as soon as possible!  Breakfast ideas can be so simple and so easy, yet absolutely delicious!  I have honestly come to love my breakfast in the morning and I love looking up new ideas to try.

Here are my "southwest eggs" from this morning:

1 whole egg

3 egg whites

1/2 cup red pepper

1/2 cup onion

1 cup mushrooms

1/2 cup black beans

1/4 mexican blend cheese

BOOM!

I am continuing with my cardio acceleration program.  Today is leg day and I am pretty excited for that.  I like how the workouts are broken up into mutli joint for one day during the week and then you hit single joint later in the week.  Like I have said a million times(but I will beat a dead horse) everything is out there, you just gotta do your homework!  Just to play off of that, yesterday I was trying box shuffles for the first time.  I set the step up and did my first set of tricep push and then went to do the skip and completely jacked it up, probably looked like the biggest fool.  I took a deep breath, put my foot back on the bench and nailed it and probably had the goofiest smile on my face for that minute of cardio acceleration.  The "old" me would have quit the first time I screwed it up or better yet, probably would have never tried it in fear of failure.  It's weird the "confidence" boost you get(I put quotes because I don't know if that's what it is but it's the best I can come up with).  So don't be scared, try something new!  If you fail, brush it off, watch the video demo over and try it again!!

Last night I attended a running clinic at my gym which was pretty good.  Some of the info I already had and it didn't surprise me to hear some of the ignorant questions coming from others in the group.  I am just happy that they were there to learn some of their mistakes and how to fix them, just as I did!

I am getting super excited to get out on my bike here in the coming weeks and really start cranking out some miles.  The most important thing I took away from last night was to not over train your body.  I was told this before but it really got drilled into my brain last night.  It is going to be hard for me because in my sick head right now I love training and pushing myself to the limit, just gotta be very careful!

Still working on that mental block of getting my body up to speed with where my head is, but I am really starting to see results and I am digging it big time.  Its an amazing feeling when you start to see what you have been working for.  Regardless of what it is you are working towards, when you start to see those results you will know the feeling I am talking about!  Give me a call, we will have a drink and celebrate together cause I know how good it feels too!

Today is a beautiful day and I am going to figure out a way to get out and enjoy it somehow!  You all should do the same!  I may bust out the new jump rope I bought and kill two birds with one stone!(no I do not know how to jump rope....) So what better way to start that teach myself outside!  Hope you all enjoy your day and nice weather!

All For now
Keep FSU and Do It For Yourself

PS apparently I had a lot more to say than I thought ;)

Changes, Changes, and more CHANGES!

So it is Saturday May 11, 2013...I can't believe how this week flew by and with summer on our heels I know that the weeks are only going to go faster and faster.  This is quite alright with me because I am the type of person who does not like to wait for things that I know are coming and are so close.  I cannot wait to be in a spot where I am comfortable with my body(yes I am getting there, more about that later) and I also can't wait for my race in September.

It is getting to be that time where I don't feel like I am up to speed with my friends.  Everyone is talking about their awesome job opportunities, graduation, and etc.  Me you ask?  I still have classes to take over the summer, Exams to take for my certification and so much more.  As they have all these things to be excited about I feel like I have to take the back seat because I don't have anything nearly as exciting going on right now.  Stop! Before you even say it, yes I know my time will come.  If I had a dollar for every time I heard that or something like it, I wouldn't need to look for a job upon graduation.  I am just venting, which is the point of this blog and this outlet...

So it's Saturday, why aren't I out with these friends I speak of?  Well I don't go out much anymore, if at all.  It isn't because I don't like to have a good time, I love having a good time just as much as the next guy.  I had an AMAZING time last weekend from the minute I left work on Friday to the minute I woke up on Monday morning.  I do however limit my drinking to little or none, which stems from multiple reasons.  If you read through previous posts, you know that alcohol really isn't my friend.  Yes I can have a drink and enjoy the social aspect of having a drink.  I do not have an interest to go to the bar anymore and get blackout silly however and I am still working on finding that balance.  It is a little scary... The other day I was driving and I started to reflect(me THINKING?! no never).  There was a point last year where I went to a family party...let me stress a family party.  All i could think of was getting drunk.  Not just drunk and laughing and having a good time with family, but getting DRUNK.  I found my self sneaking around and hiding drinks etc so no one knew how much I had to drink.  That's a little scary if you look back on it.  The good thing that came of it however was that I can look back now and say, no I am not going back to the way I was.  Do I have to run away from drinking and having a good time? No but I need to work on finding that balance.

Now on to today!  Today was a great day from start to finish as well.  Is it any surprise that these good days are coming more often and more natural now?  Probably not.  Today I was at work and it felt like all of my parents of my students were noticing me.  I got so MANY compliments and it felt amazing!  They were raining their praise on my and I loved it, then again who doesn't love a good compliment now and again?!?!

As for my workout...WOW!! That is all I have to say.  It was simply amazing!  I love the cardio acceleration aspect.  People have been looking at me like I am nuts and that makes me go even harder.  When I left I snapped a couple pics as I have been doing throughout this journey just to keep track of where I was and how far I have come.  For the first time I looked at them and could really see a difference.  I can see my body changing and transforming into something new and it is so rewarding.  Finally!  All the hard work and hours spent in the gym and kitchen are paying off!  My mom actually laughed at me a little when I reached for my scale to measure out dinner for tonight.  After she was done laughing she said I guess that's why you have been so successful at this!  This is so true!  I have become dedicated to what I am doing and I am ok with the people who laugh at it.  At the end of the day I am doing something I love and something I am proud of and that is all that matters.

I also took my Praxis II exam which is a step towards being done.  I am awaiting the official results from it and it is unsettling.  I finished the test very quickly (they schedule you for 2.5 hours but it took me about 1).  This could be a good sign, because I have learned in my assessment class that if you know the material and it is a well designed test, it shouldn't take you long.   Let's keep our fingers crossed I am one step closer to being able to go out and help children!

Tomorrow is Mother's Day and I will be up and out early getting coffee and flowers for mom before I am off to work for the day.  Gotta take care of the people who support you!  The people who support you in whatever it may be that you are doing will become your "ride or die" crew and you will see how important they are. 

Whatever you are doing, do it to your absolute best.  Know that you are not alone in your fight and there is someone, somewhere who has gone through what you are going through and they are willing to help!

All for now
Keep FSU and Do It For Yourself

Inspiration? Must Have the Wrong Guy

Today is Friday! YEEEEE!!  Hard to believe it is May for one.  Also hard to believe I am wrapping up my last semester as an undergrad....Honestly can't wait to get the F out of here!  The weather today is absolutely beautiful and it is the first day I am able to wear flip flops so needless to say my little heart is all kinds of happy.

Started a new program yesterday that incorporates cardio acceleration and it is an incredible workout.  You are constantly moving the whole time and I have had a blast the past two days doing it!  People look at you a little weird when you run in place after you just pumped out a set, but I am not all that worried about it haha.  Maybe someone will ask about it and then they can learn something new, that would be cool!

SO down to the nitty gritty of this post.  YESTERDAY!  I wanted to write this post so bad last night because I feel like I will miss something now but I was slammed at work and I just didn't get around to it.  It was my last class with a professor who I have had a bond with since the minute I met her.  We just hit it off and we got along really well and I have enjoyed every class with her since two semesters ago.  She was giving me flack for not wearing my medal for her on Tuesday so I wore my broad street shirt for her.  So I said to her "Look I wore my shirt just for you!"  She breaks into a conversation with me about that race and my upcoming race in September....Someone interested in something I'M doing??  Hmmm interesting but I'll go with it. 

Someone in the class over heard our conversation and jumped in..TWO people now interested in what I'm doing!  So we just hung-out and talked about races and everything in between.  They both asked me to keep things updated on Facebook and let them know how the training is going.  Molly even said she would come to the race! That was super cool, if you read the Broad Street Run post you'll know that having people there for you is very powerful.  Just before I left my professor said I think it's awesome what you're doing and it is really INSPIRATIONAL... There is that word again! Me? No way, I am just having a good time enjoying my life Dr. J!

So after class I went home, packed my cooler, grabbed my water jug and headed over to the gym.  Hit the workout and then made my way down to the pool to start work(I am a swim instructor and yes I love it).  So as I was getting my things together for my students I had my whey and my BCAA for post workout.  Mind you I am not into crazy test boosters, and this crap and that.  I stick with the basics here.  So naturally this chick walks out of the office(can't stand her FYI) and sees that I have two shakers on the table.  So she starts to give me crap... I am just trying to enjoy my chicken and recover real quick before I get in the pool and she has gotta give me flack about my shakers, REALLY?!  So I just brush it off and continue to enjoy my delicious food...

Side not here, the girl who is in charge of inservice is sitting at the table as well.  Mind you when I started working here I was in a bit of a bad spot, so I may or may not have been a total ass. Just sayin... So I didn't get off on the best foot with this chick...

Anyway she starts to stick up for me.......WAIT WHAT?! If I said this girl hated my guts at one point and time it would be and understatement.  Now all of the sudden she is sticking up for me and saying how its pretty cool how I have a plan and stick to it when it comes to my nutrition....Wait for it... "He's pretty inspiring..." AND AGAIN!!  at this point I just don't even know what to do with myself.  So not only do two people think that I am in some way shape or form inspiring but the only chick legit hated me and now has respect for me!  It was just an all around amazing feeling.  Call me crazy, guess what, I DON'T CARE we have already come to the conclusion that everyone is crazy in some way shape or form.  Embrace it and love it for what it is!

So aside from this exciting news(I mean I thought it was cool so that's all that matters) there is not much else going on.  Class around 2, then off to work for the night.  Work tomorrow in the morning and then my Praxis II exam at 1 in the afternoon(feeling indifferent about that).  If I pass then I pass, if not oh well, get em again tomorrow. 

Thanks for reading, if you read, if not thanks for stopping by.  Have a great weekend and make someone smile today :)

All for now
Keep FSU and Do It For Yourself

**Edit**

See didn't I tell you that I would forget something! And for me it was the coolest part of this whole day and I somehow still forgot it!!

Anyway, there is a guy who works out at my gym and he's ripped, to say the least... I am not quite sure what he does, he's there a lot mid day or early afternoon, drives a beautiful Benz and is covered in tattoos. Did I mention he also has a sneaker collection? We aren't just talking a few pairs here, I'm talking every pair of Jays that come out, he has em. Anyway I digress. So he noticed the other day that I had cut weight which was cool in and of it self. When I was talking with him I told him I was doing Broad Street. So when I saw him after the race he asked how it went. I told him real well and I finished in 1:38 and some seconds. So he asked again how long it was. I'll remind you that he is covered in tattoos so there isn't much he cares about haha. He says "are you f'ing kidding me? That's so awesome dude, I ran like 2.5 miles the other day and it took me about 30 mins. I respect that!"  Why not just take an air pump and stick it right in my ear and turn it on. Here I am thinking man this dude is ripped up, I wanna be like that and in the same breath he thinks something I did was awesome!  What and incredible feeling that was I must say!  Just wanted to add this because it was so awesome for me. 

Thanks =]

Abercrombie Just Wants to Be "Cool"

Where do I even begin....I found this article on Facebook via a post from someone and I was completely dumbfounded when I read it.  As someone who wore a size XXL at one point and time and someone who bounced around all over with pants sizes, I'm offended to be honest. 

The fact that the CEO only hires "good" looking people in his store cracks me up to begin with.  I don't know about anyone else who is reading this but I think beauty is in the eye of the beholder.  I can go out with my friends and we will all think different people are good looking and we may not agree on one person being good looking to us the entire night.  I have one friend in particular who I can go out with and know that we would never chase the same girl because our tastes are that different.  I would like to make a quick comparison to put in in perspective.  Does everyone you know truly love Indian food?  Probably not, but does that mean it isn't good? NO!

The next thing that gave me a real chuckle is that he "justifies" having XL and XXL sizes for men because he wants to appeal to the athletic built males.  Has anyone seen the athletic guys who shop in this store.....

Right because this is my role model, I want to be exactly like the Situation....

This article frustrates me on so many levels, but mostly because of the pressure it puts on girls.  People may argue with this fact but I think it is a prime example of girls receiving more pressure than guys to look a certain way.  The guys who wear XL and XXL can still shop in this store but girls who wear that size for a variety of reasons can't? I remember going shopping and not being able to find jeans and having to take the walk of shame to the counter because I had to order them and have them shipped to my house.  It was absolutely humiliating....however it shouldn't be about that. 

Society and other people should not decide for you how YOU should look.  This is ultimately a choice for you to make.  Don't ever listen to someone when they tell you that you have to do something or be a certain way.  If you are anything like me, you will push back and not do it, just to spite them.  It can be an ugly circle that no one wants to be apart of.  This is about much more than the clothing or looking a certain way though.  Ultimately your choices are yours and they should remain just that.  Don't ever let anyone tell you that you have to/should do something that you don't agree with.  No one told me that I needed to start doing anything.  Everything I put on this website is something that I wanted to do and it makes things that much more rewarding.  I urge you to find something YOU want to do and do it to its fullest(is that hypocritical?).

Supporting a company that bases its values on something like this is not something I will do and I plan to tell every person who I know about this.  I urge you to do the same because this is just ridiculous to me.  Please leave thoughts or comments below because I would love to hear what people have to say about this. 



All for now...

Keep FSU and Do It For Yourself!

Stop Saying I Wish and Start Saying I DID!

So here it is, the moment you have all been waiting for....(drum roll please) the play by play from Sunday's "race."  So where do I start? Naturally I have no idea where to start because I feel like I say a million things but never get my point across...

So as you may or may not know I got into the city on Saturday after work, some time around 4pm or 4:30.  I got all checked in, took my cooler upstairs and no fridge!  For $500 a night plus parking I was a little heated to say the least.  Well I got my fridge and jumped in the shower because I had to hop on the subway and meet Melissa for our carb loaded dinner.  I gave you most of the story about my city slicker "skills" but in case you missed it, I bought $20 worth of subway tokens to later find out I only needed two and I stuck out like a sore thumb haha!  I made it to temple campus and had a nice pasta dinner before I returned to my hotel room for the night.

So Sunday morning arrives and I am like a kid on Christmas morning.  I can't wait to get up and get going!  I rolled out of bed and laid out all my clothes for the race.  I went to grab my breakfast that I had prepared because there was no way I was going to eat the hotel breakfast.  Side note I try to prepare all my meals and cook all my own food because it is huge during this transformation and journey.  Well my breakfast way frozen from the stupid fridge the front desk sent up.  So I some how choked down my frozen protein pancakes and drank my cup off coffee and then it was back to the subway to get to the race.  The subway ride was free with my bib so I didn't need one of the 17 tokens I had in my bag...

I got to the course and found Melissa and it was just a waiting game from there.  We were standing around and just waiting to get going and for some reason I was pretty calm relatively speaking.  Aside from the fact that I was standing at my FIRST starting carol for my FIRST race, I was pretty calm and just ready to get going.  I did some dynamic stretching and cued up my tunes and I was ready to roll.  Then the commotion started...people yelling, clapping and getting all kinds of excited.  Our coral started to move up and Melissa looked at me and said "Well...you ready?!?!"  The only thing I could think to say was "As ready as I could be."  Hahaha how lame is that?!?! We got to the line and "Sweet Caroline" was blasting through the speakers, here we go!

And off we went! We hit our first mile somewhere around 9:30 and I was hyped.  I had been told my first mile was going to take upwards of 12:00 due to the amount of people.  From there we just kept trucking.  Hitting just about every water station we could.  Before I knew it we were at the Temple campus and we got some love from Melissa's roommate and John(the guy who's spot I took, I was a little surprised her boyfriend wasn't in the group to cheer her on though).  We were in the zone and I was loving every second of it.  The amount of energy throughout this race was incredible.  The people who lined the course were AMAZING!!  They were high-fiving and cheering you along every step of the way.  Something that is still sitting with me came around mile 5.  My phone beeped for a text and I am thinking to myself what the heck is this?!?!  It was a text from one of my friends, the first and only that I got that day.  She wished me good luck and said she hoped I was had a good race day.  This gave me an incredible sense of energy.

After mile 5 hit, I was just about in my zone and I knew I was going to finish.  I wanted to hit my time of 1:30:00 so bad but Melissa did not want to push her knee which I completely understood.  We hit the CVS on broad street and the crowd was a little more thin than I thought...then it hit me.....I was going to see my family!  Well we approached mile marker 9 and I think the entire city of Philadelphia could hear my mother screaming.  I looked over on to the side walk and I could see her jumping as high as she could, screaming, clapping and grinning ear to ear.  Everyone was there to cheer on that last mile.  I gave my mother a high five and started to get tears in my eyes(thank god I had sunglasses on).  She was so proud and I could see it shinning through.  It was 8 months of hard work, sweat, pressure, fight, everything summed up into one powerful, magnificent moment that I could never put into words.  It meant the world to me to get that high five at the start of that final mile.  She got it....

Here I am, post high five from mom, getting ready to crush my final mile.  Glad you couldn't see the tears.

It was on the last mile and we crushed it!!  It was our fastest mile of the race and it felt awesome.  I threw my arms up as I crossed the finish, or at least it felt that way in my head.  WE DID IT!!!  It was into the navy yard to collect our medals and get some much needed food.  We grabbed out stuff and stretched out a little bit.

Here is a picture of Melissa and I, go figure I could release the grip on my soft pretzel to put it down for the pic!  From there we stretched a little more and headed for the subway to start our journey home.

One of the last things I will share with you all is this picture of Melissa that my grandfather snagged.

The smile on her face just about says it all for the entire day.  Let me just tell you that this chick was absolutely amazing from start to finish.  She kept me going and I think I did the same for her.  At one point she looked at me and said "I never thought you would be doing this let alone be the one pushing us to run faster!"  She was simply amazing through the entire thing and I can't thank her enough.  I am so thankful to have a friend like her in my life and I couldn't ask for a better one!

The last thing I will share branches off of Melissa's comment.  I used to be that person who would sit and wait and wish.  I always wished I was someone else, or had the courage to do something that someone else was doing.  I thought about it today and the reason I wore my medal all day yesterday was because somewhere along the line someone looked at me and thought, man he did The Broad Street Run, I wish I could do that.  My final thought to you is STOP!!  Stop saying I wish and start saying I did.  I never thought in a million years that I would be doing something so amazing, but that high five from mom and crossing that finish line were the two most rewarding things I have ever received.  Put your mind to something, go out, and get it DONE!!  The only person holding you back from what you want is YOU!   It doesn't have to be a race, or a tri, or anything athletic for that matter.  My goal is to reach as many people as I possibly can and show them that anything you want, is possible.....

Thank you to everyone who reads this and I hope you enjoy.

All for now....

Keep FSU and Do It For Yourself

It's Monday, What Else is New?

Just as the title says, it's Monday....weather sucks, I am very over school at this point and I am extremely grumpy, can ya tell?!  Morning class was a waste of my time today.  I got absolutely nothing accomplished.  I have been in the library for about 3 hours now and again, nothing has really resulted in it.

So I am sure you are all(that is sarcasm because I don't know if anyone even sees this) wondering about the race yesterday...well I am sorry but I am reserving that for a separate post because I would like to wait until I get some pictures to share etc.

I don't have much to say about today, I have a short fuse and I am just not in the mood to deal with people.  I want to go workout but my body is still sore and recovering.  If i have learned anything it is that you need to listen to your body, SUPER IMPORTANT!  I can barely keep my eyes open and I am in class until probably at least 6:30 in not later.

There are so many things I want to say about yesterday but I am trying super hard to save them all for a specific post on just the run.  I will say that I have been messaging back and forth with this old friend of mine and I am starting to get scared.  Very scared to be perfectly honest.  I can feel things resurfacing and it is quite possibly the most frightening thing in the world for me.  I don't want to get hurt again and I know there is no way my body can physically or mentally take that amount of pain again.  However I find myself constantly wondering.....all the what if's and but's etc are beginning to kill me and I don't like it at all.  I sit and wait for messages on my phone and wonder whats going on between them, but I don't know if I like it or not.  One thing is for sure, I need to be very very careful and very cautious about what I am doing.  I still have a lot of doubts and a lot of unanswered questions and I cannot let myself become trapped...

The last thing I will share is an experience I had yesterday, not related to the run.  A woman who lives down the street came up and was talking with my parents.  She looked across the room at me and then asked my mom where I was...she's got a screw loose that's for sure.  However she asked me why I was doing this? What possessed me to start this and keep going.  Honestly I HATE this question more than anything in the world.  Why you may ask?  Because whenever the question is asked, I can't give an honest answer to the person who is asking it, no matter who it may be.  I have been asked this question multiple times before and after a long awkward pause, I spit out some generic answer about how I wanted to get in shape and blah blah blah.  Mind you this answer is not a lie, yes I wanted to get in shape, that is absolutely true.  It is the part I leave out that is probably more important. 

So why? Why did I do it you ask?  Well things got bad, they got bad fast and by bad, well bad is probably and understatement.  I was spinning out of control pretty fast and pretty hard, that's for sure.  I discovered a mixture of things, between alcohol pills and whatever else worked to basically knock me out until I had to wake up the next day and face the reality that was my life.  I had lost the one person who I thought understood me, I felt lied to and deceived, taken advantage of, and I figured there was basically nothing left so F it.  I continued on the freight train rolling down hill for months.  Fake it til you make it eh?  Well i was getting damn good at faking.

It was at the end of the summer, after my birthday that I decided I needed to make a change.  I went to a friends wedding and got all kinds of sloppy and I knew that was enough.  I didn't know where to start or what to do or who to call.  It was hard but at that point I really felt like I had no one.  I felt as though everyone had turned against me for multiple reasons.  My relationship with this person was slightly frowned upon by on lookers lets just say.  So in turn I felt like when it ended I had no one because she was gone and the people who I had before were gone because I went against them to be with her.  So of the few people who I still had left among them was a very good friend, one who is still part of this journey today.  He gave me  some small things to start working on and has been building me up every single day.  Dude is amazing and I will swear to this day that he probably saved my life.

When I started I didn't know what I was doing, where I was going or anything to be honest.  What I did know was that I needed a change and I needed it fast or I was going to end up dead.  So I just started going to the gym and following what he told me to do.  By the time January rolled around another friend was home and he joined the gym where I work out.  He started a program and asked me to do it with him and I continued with the changes.  I just followed the plan and stuck to it, it sounds so simple, but everything you need to know is out there somewhere, you just have to put in the time and do your homework.  Every time I left the gym I felt better than the time before and even better than when I walked in the door.  Honestly if it weren't for that place I have no idea where I would be.  My friends have been an incredible support system and I couldn't ask for better people in my life.  Some of them think I am crazy and most of them make fun of me but they don't know any of the things that I just stated above.  I guess if they did they would think twice before making fun of me for not wanting to go to the bar....oh well

So why did I start?  Because I wasn't ready to become a statistic whether it be from death, obesity, etc. I wasn't going to do it.  I started because I knew something was wrong and I knew I needed a change.  Do I stand at the mountain tops screaming that I "beat it" no....do I tell everyone how much I've lost or how far I have come, nope...I just continue on my journey and keep to myself.  I am enjoying where I am right now.  I feel like I have lost a few friends but I have also gained a few.  Time goes on and people do change, if someone is meant to be a part of you life they certainly will.

I apologize for the depressing post but there were some things I needed to get out there and obviously this is the place where I have begun to do that and I will continue to do it.  If you actually read this, I thank you because you are the encouragement I need.  If this helps you, share it with someone who it might help.  Helping each other is the most important thing we can do.  I received help when I needed it the most and I am going to do anything in my power to help someone who needs it.  You CAN make the change that you want and it IS 100% possible.  You have my word.  It may not happen over night but the harder you work at something the more satisfying that reward will be at the end.

Stay tuned for my post on the race.  Thanks for reading.

Until next time
Keep FSU and Do It For Yourself

Broad Street Run Here I Come!

Well D Day has arrived! Or should I say will be here shortly.  After a few debacles on the subway trying to get to my friends apartment I find myself sitting in my hotel room trying to get into my zone and get focused for my race tomorrow and yet I am all over the place.

If you have been following my blog at all I am sure you may or may not have read about my encounter with an old friend I had a few weeks back.  Well last night we met up again.  I was dog sitting for a friend and I actually initiated our meeting this time.  I asked her to come over and have a glass on wine with me on the deck after work.  She responded and asked if I would like her to bring sushi, which naturally was a yes because I love sushi!  So we hung out for the night and she ended up staying with me that night.  It was amazing to have her with me again and all of my feelings returned immediately.  This is good and bad for me in so many ways.  I do not know what to do about it so I have turned to my blog which is becoming a big part of my life surprisingly.

Tomorrow is going to be interesting for me on so many levels....most people have been making fun of me or giving me flack for the changes I have made since September.  Some of my friends don't understand it, but also don't really try.  They just give me beef for not wanting to go to the bar anymore.  When I cross the finish line tomorrow it won't be all bells and roses like I had wished for.  I will have my parents there who are for sure proud of me and I can see that.  My grandmother also made it a point to tell me that she will be there no matter what and she is going to see me run.  I didn't have the heart to explain that there will be 40,000 other grand-moms there to see someone.  Nonetheless, the people who I want to be there, won't.  It's a little sobering but it isn't stopping me from doing what I want to do because I am doing it for one person and one person only, MYSELF.  I am proving to myself that I CAN be that person who I said I wanted to be so many times. 

Aside from this I am in the city of Brotherly Love and it's great, I love it here.  I am not a city slicker and I stick out like a sore thumb here right now.  The second I walked out of the parking garage the guy next to me asked if I knew where I was going!  I didn't think I stuck out that bad haha!

My nerves are starting to kick in big time for multiple reasons.  I just want to go out and be successful tomorrow.  If you are reading this you might as well what is successful for me tomorrow?  I am not really sure either.  I would like to finish between and hour and half to an hour and forty-five minutes.  This would be HUGE!  I have never wanted something this bad!  It funny because I was talking with a guy on my way back to the subway and he asked how long I had been running for.  I have only been running since November and I am set to do a ten mile race tomorrow...WHAT AM I THINKING?!?! I am not sure but I love it and I am absolutely addicted to this sport and the endurance sport aspect. 

I can't wait for tomorrow and I am super excited and just trying to get my mind wrapped around everything that it will symbolize.  It will symbolize far more than I could ever put into words on this silly blog that I am not sure anyone even reads.  If you are reading this though I thank you and I hope you have found something that you can put your everything into because it feels amazing.

All for now
Keep FSU and Do It For Yourself